how to pleasure a woman manually
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how to pleasure a woman manuallyWe may earn a commission through links on our site.It’s not something that you can half-ass for two minutes before rushing into P-in-V or P-in-B sex. Foreplay is something you should take your time with to get both your partner and you in the mood. After all, you shouldn’t be feigning excitement or mindlessly going through the motions just for your partner’s sake. Foreplay is something that should turn you on as well. Honestly, the term foreplay is somewhat of a misnomer because it implies that what comes next—the actual “play”—is somehow better. But that’s not always the case. Most people with vulvas can’t orgasm through penetration alone. They require clitoral stimulation in order to climax, which can happen with manual stimulation, oral sex, or sex toy action. That said, sex isn’t all about orgasming. The rubbing, touching, kissing, and talking you have before penetrative sex should be enjoyable in and of itself. Now to get the best foreplay tips, we spoke to various sex experts, therapists, and psychiatrists. Try one, two, or all of the foreplay tips below the next time you start fooling around and just see what happens. 1) Sext throughout the day Foreplay doesn’t simply start in the bedroom. It can start from the moment you wake up. Little texts like “Can’t wait to get naked with you tonight” can get your partner excited before you even set foot in the same room. If sending nudes is something that turns your partner on, go ahead and swap some sexy photos with one another. You’re in no rush to finish it. (Though if you are pressed for time, here are the best sex position for quickies.) Instead of quickly stripping down, start by taking off her shirt. Wait a few minutes before you take off her pants, then her bra, and so on. You can then focus on that newly revealed body part. So after taking off her pants, massage her legs. Once the bra is gone, you can lick and gently suck on her nipples.http://cosmetic-elit.com/pic/exercise-manual-total-gym-1000.xml
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4) Get wet together If you’ve ever attempted to have sex in the shower or in a body of water, you’ll know that it’s nearly impossible to thrust when your body is submerged in liquid. If you find the right fit, you can really turn her on. (If you've never tried low-rise briefs, we highly recommend them! ). You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.Prior to even touching them, you’ll want to set the mood with lighting and music, and then go ahead and whip out the massage oil. From there you want to start massaging them, and at first, it shouldn’t even seem like an erotic massage. In other words, do what you want to do, and enjoy it while you're doing it. If you like how her calves feel, stroke them in appreciation. If you like her butt, kiss it. “When a man is loving what he’s doing, it’s going to show through and turn her on, too,” says Perry. 10) Take it easy at first Yes, the clitoris is the obvious place to focus your attention. For starters, trying lying perpendicular to her body and stroking her clitoris with your tongue in a horizontal motion, rather than up and down. She’ll appreciate the change in stimulation, hopefully enough to return the favor. 12) Drive her wild with the figure-8 technique The figure-8 tongue technique is one of the most tried and true ways to get things going below the belt. When you’re at her service down below, work the supersensitive area around her clitoris in a figure-8 pattern. Arouse her with gentle sucking until the little button swells, then carefully expose the area with your fingers. Use the slippery underside of your tongue to circle it to the left and then to the right. With the rougher top side of the tongue, flick from right to left and then up and down. Finally, work up to figure 8s, alternating between your tongue's smooth underside and firmer tip. Constantly vary the degrees of pressure you use.http://eg-steel.com/userfiles/ez-teller-manual.xml 13) Don't overlook the labia Oft overlooked as mere barriers to the vagina, the labia are packed with nerve endings and shouldn't be ignored. Hold each one between your thumb and forefinger and massage it, working your way up and down. Or, using all of your fingers and your palm, “smoosh” the labia together, almost like you’re (gently!) kneading dough. 14) Explore her entire body Don't just zero in on her genitals. The body is filled with erogenous zones like her neck, thighs, and breasts. “Genitals are fascinating and fun, but try to spend some time focusing on your partner’s entire body instead of going straight for her crotch,” says Cassie Fuller, cofounder of Baltimore sex-ed company Touch Of Flavor. “Try caressing, licking, or nibbling other erogenous zones, such as her neck, back, ears, belly, or wrists.” 15) Try a toy A vibrator buzzing around her erogenous zones can be just as stimulating, if not more, than your hands alone. Bring one in for the assist during foreplay, touching her everywhere but her vagina with it. Try one of MH's Best Sex Toys of the Year, The Le Wand Massager. Most men only recognize that last, no-turning-back feeling, that occurs just before ejaculation, says David Copeland, author of How to Succeed with Women. By then it’s too late to do anything about it. Try to become familiar with the two or three more subtle sensations that precede that one, so that you can slow down at the right time. 19) Don't forget about kissing Don't forget what got you here in the first place. “Women get their greatest erotic pleasure from frequent, passionate kissing,” says Patti Britton, Ph.D., clinical sexologist, and author of The Art of Sex Coaching: Expanding Your Practice. “If you get the sense that she’s starting to lose interest, kissing is always the best way to bring her back into it.” Just remember that passionate kissing doesn’t always mean frantically swabbing out her tonsils.https://labroclub.ru/blog/3m-mp7740i-personal-projector-manual Try to mix up your tongue play with the occasional closed-mouth kiss on her nose, eyes, and forehead. 20) Reward her bravery When she initiates the action, make an extra effort to please her sexually and to let her know how much you approve. Tell her you loved how she got things going.You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io. But there are definitely some tips and techniques that I wish someone had told my early lovers before I was willing and able to. So if you’re wondering what those are, here’s a guide for pleasuring straight women (for straight guys): Story continued below 1. First, make sure she is into you. Not sorta kinda into you. Not “if I keep pressing, she will eventually just relent” into you. INTO YOU. Approach the entire experience with a sense of playful and yet, deeply attuned curiosity. How do you know if she is into you. Here are some clues. She tells you. She keeps touching you. She keeps leaning in to get closer. When you go in for that first kiss, she responds openly and enthusiastically. If, however, you detect even the remotest sense of a recoil or flinch when you touch or get close to her, here’s what you do: Go home and love yourself. This woman is just not that into you. But if you have received the sense that she is kissing you back and is moving towards your other touches (or even better, is directing your hands towards the places she likes) then you may proceed with awareness, restraint and caution. 2. Approach the entire experience with a sense of playful and yet, deeply attuned curiosity. Touching should be done with a sense of desire mixed with reverence. In other words, make sure you appreciate that damned body you are being allowed to have access to!! IMPORTANT NOTE: Most women have some insecurities about their bodies. So wherever possible, create nice lighting. Candlelight is always a good thing. This is not the same as saying, “Holy shit I want to fuck your brains out.http://gerryikputuandpartners.com/images/breville-professional-juice-extractor-manual.pdf” I hope you can see the difference. Story continued below As you progress, here are some other cues to look for: sensual moans, sighs, ahhs, ooohs, mmmms. As you progress, here are some other cues to look for: sensual moans, sighs, ahhs, ooohs, mmmms. IMPORTANT NOTE: contrary to popular belief: a wet vulva is not necessarily a sign that she is ready for sex nor even that she is even into you. Now, that doesn’t mean pummeling the poor girl with, “Do you like that?” “How about that?” “And that, is that good?” Establish off the top some playful rules. Avoid genitals FOR A LONG TIME. Like a long, long time. Tease, move forward, retreat and repeat. Once you have done that for a long time, with lots of signs that you are on the right track, you may proceed to the genitals. Story continued below Now for some reason (I’m looking at you bad sex ed and mainstream porn), lots of guys treat the female genitals like a hole that they have lost something inside of. Then they try to jam as many fingers as they can in there, seemingly to uncover some missing keys. Hey guy: Don’t. DO. That. IMPORTANT NOTE: The equivalent to a penis IS NOT THE VAGINA. It is the vulva. Get that through your head from now on. The reason this is important to get through your head is because the most sensitive parts of a woman’s parts are not buried deep inside of her like a sunken treasure. Like your penis, the vulva has all kinds of sensitive areas that you can see. In fact, your penis actually started out as a clitoris (that has changed and evolved with hormones and time). So whether you are using your mouth or your fingers to explore, please involve the labia, the first few inches of the vagina and of course, THE CLITORIS. Again, all women like different things but a great rule of thumb is to tease the outside area with varying touches and then gently massage the clitoris. You can do some light tapping, and some gentle stimulation with fingers and see what she likes.http://www.cuadernos.in/wp-content/plugins/formcraft/file-upload/server/content/files/16286e6124cb81---cadex-c7200-manual.pdf If you’re a real hero, you can also ask her if there is a toy she likes to play with that she would let you use. You may also see if she has interest in you touching her in that area with your mouth. But again, everyone likes something slightly different so ask her to guide you. 5. If you are granted permission to her vagina, the most sensitive part as I mentioned above is the first few inches inside. If a woman were lying on her back with a clock placed upright inside the lower part of her vagina there is a little spongy area would be just inside, on the upper wall, at 12 o’clock. It’s also often referred to as the G-spot. Some women like it stimulated, some don’t. So again, look and listen for her cues. 6. And if you are allowed to proceed further into penetrative sex using your penis, the two positions that are often the most pleasurable for women are her on top, the CAT position and with her on her stomach from behind. Again, these will vary from woman to woman. Slow and steady wins the race my little tortoises. I know there are a few unicorns out there who will debate me on this, but the vast majority of us in long term relationships are really focused on quality, not quantity. For all you women reading this: are there any other tips I’m missing that you wish your guy knew. A simple guide to pleasuring women, for straight men. A Guide To Pleasuring Women (For Guys) If you're a guy who sleeps with women, or hopes to at some point, here are some helpful tips. I Went To An Orgy. Here’s What I Learned. Once upon a time I went to a strange sex party and learned a few things about pleasure. A Guide To Male Desire Unpacking some of the sexual myths about men. SIDEBAR SQUARE ADS SIDEBAR TOWER ADS AUTHOR BOX Posted By Cynthia Loyst I’m a girl who talks a lot about sex and pleasure. How much is too much when it comes to noise and sex. Couples make all kinds of spoken and unspoken rules within their relationship. Should they?autoescuelatosal.com/galeria/files/97-jeep-grand-cherokee-repair-manual.pdf Read More 7 Comments Ben on January 17, 2018 at 1:06 am Brava, Cynthia, for writing this article. Clearly, there are good straight men out there who want to do right by women, and you’re addressing their need for good information. One of my missions in life is to rise above the myths we straight men have been shackled with regarding women, sex, and our own sexuality, and to help other straight men do likewise. You corroborates some of the conclusions I’ve reached on my own. For example, how lovemaking can go to a whole new level when the man shows the woman his appreciation of her body, both in words (like telling her how beautiful her pussy is) and in deeds (touching her with a mixture of desire and reverence, as you described). In fact, I think one of the greatest gifts a man can give a woman is to help her feel more comfortable in her own skin. One thing I would add to your article is that there’s nothing unmanly about a man using something other than his penis to pleasure a woman. Reply Gina on January 18, 2018 at 8:08 pm I just want to say that these tips apply to lesbians as well. Reply Cynthia Loyst on January 19, 2018 at 2:51 pm Yes.Cheer’s Reply Michelle on October 14, 2019 at 3:23 pm pleasing a woman is not that hard.Not to mention that I usually experience pain, in life in general and during sex too. I’ve basically given up on sex and so has my husband. He hates to cause pain, but he also has so many insecurities when it comes to bed play. He came like that and during the last 30 years I haven’t been able to ease that. No one ever told me life is easy. Anyway. Thank you for this little essay. It shows me there are things we can try and see if they work for us. And thank you Nigel for your little tip. A soft makeup brush shouldn’t be able to cause any pain. Yours, Ann Reply JULIE HOLT on December 22, 2019 at 4:32 pm THE BEST SEX I HAD WAS BECAUSE OF HIS BELIEFS.http://www.vitrierbxl.be/wp-content/plugins/formcraft/file-upload/server/content/files/16286e622829f1---cadex-c7400-manual.pdfMOST WOMEN IGNORED HIM AS BEING TOO QUIET AND RESPECTFUL AS THOUGH THAT WAS A BAD THING Reply Leave a reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. For example, it prevents us from showing popups like this one over and over. They're safe and don't contain sensitive information. Join our newsletter to get the latest articles, event invites and store discounts delivered straight to your inbox. Tippi Coronavirus: Tips for Living With COVID-19 Coronavirus and COVID-19: All Resources But it can be as simple as time, tenderness, and knowing how to stimulate her sweet spots. By Dennis Thompson Jr Medically Reviewed by Allison Young, MD Last Updated: March 9, 2019 Not sure where to begin when it comes to the female orgasm. Start with these three tips. Masterfile Bringing a woman to orgasm has little to do with pornographic skills. The key is spending more time on foreplay and learning about the two spots that, when stimulated, can lead to a female orgasm. It also doesn't hurt to understand which sexual positions provide the best chance for orgasm. (Hint: The missionary position isn’t one of them!) Read on to discover the top three secrets to the female orgasm. 1. Spend More Time on Foreplay You may be aroused and ready to go from the minute she gives you a sexy glance. But many women need plenty of physical and emotional stimulation to become aroused, lubricated, and primed for an orgasm. That's why foreplay is so crucial. It's shouldn't be rushed or treated like an obligatory task. In fact, foreplay can begin hours before sex actually occurs, and every minute of it will prepare her for an orgasm. Here are some tips for getting both of you in the mood. Stimulate her mentally. For some women, mental arousal is just as important as physical arousal. A sexy note or a flirtatious call during the day can get her thinking about your upcoming liaison. Candles, fresh flowers, and mood music can also create a loving and sensuous atmosphere.https://lawcab.ru/wp-content/plugins/formcraft/file-upload/server/content/files/16286e635e200e---cadet-manuals.pdf For many women, closeness and emotional intimacy can lead to better sexual experiences and more orgasms. Use a tender touch. Caressing her gently can create sexual tension before you go any further. Hug her, hold her hand, or touch her thigh. Female orgasm is more likely to happen if, when you're kissing a woman, you let your hands roam to more erotic regions of her body. (Another hint: Yes, the breasts are an erogenous zone, but they're not the only one. Try stroking her back or her thighs, or sliding your fingers into her hair.) Take kissing to the next level. Kissing is essential to foreplay. Discovering new places to kiss that turn her on is both fun and rewarding. Try the back of her neck or her shoulders for starters. Don't forget to talk. Women tend to be more verbal, and hearing how good she's making you feel can help her open up and have fun. 2. Know Her Sweet Spots There are two places on the body that are critical to female orgasm. Here's how to stimulate them so she can achieve orgasm. The clitoris This tiny organ contains a high concentration of nerve endings and can be found near the top of the vulva. Once she's aroused, the hood will draw back and the clitoris will become erect. The G-spot This other orgasmic area is located inside the vagina. It's a bundle of nerve endings about two inches up from the pubic bone on the inner, upper wall of the vagina. To find the G-spot, gently slide your finger inside her vagina with your palm facing up, then curl your finger up. Be warned — some women love having their G-spot directly stimulated, while others prefer less pressure on this sensitive area. Explore different techniques and ask your partner which she likes best. 3. Try Female-Friendly Sexual Positions Given what you've just learned, you can pretty much guess that the best sexual positions for female orgasm involve those that provide maximum stimulation to the clitoris or G-spot (or both!).http://www.AUTODESGUACECOIN.COM/ckfinder/userfiles/files/97-jeep-grand-cherokee-repair-manual-pdf.pdf These positions include: Woman on top This position provides some of the best stimulation of the G-spot, given the angle of the penis. She also can move her body in a way that stimulates her clitoris. Rear entry This position isn't so great for clitoral stimulation, but provides excellent penetration and stimulation of the G-spot. Either of you can reach under during sex to rub the clitoris. Sitting Having your partner sit on your lap allows for both deep penetration and good clitoral stimulation. It also provides plenty of intimacy. Notice that the missionary position isn't on this list. It's difficult for a man to stimulate the clitoris when he's on top, unless he really grinds his pelvis into his partner. The angle of penetration is also all wrong for G-spot stimulation. Still having trouble. Don’t be afraid to ask your partner for feedback, to make sure she likes what you’re doing. Women may want to consider working with a sex therapist, or getting a medical checkup to see if any diseases or medications are affecting their ability to reach orgasm. Achieving the female orgasm may require some trial and error, but don't forget to have fun while you're trying. Your sex life will thank you. NEWSLETTERS Sign up for our Sexual Health Newsletter. Enter your email Subscribe By subscribing you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. The Latest in Sexual Health Why Young Americans Are Having Less Sex Than Ever Before A newly published study that wrapped up two years before the pandemic finds that young people are having less sex in the 21st century. By Jessica Migala August 11, 2020 A His-and-Hers Sexual Health Issue A man’s penile microbiome could predict whether his female partner develops bacterial vaginosis, study suggests. By Stacey Colino August 5, 2020 5 Tips for Choosing the Best Sex Therapist for You and Your Partner Looking for a qualified therapist to help you with your sexual issues, but baffled about where to start. By Laura McArdle March 6, 2020 What Is a Sex Therapist and How Can One Help Me. Whether you’re dealing with sexual function issues or intimacy concerns, a sex therapist can help. By Catherine Pearson March 5, 2020 Most Helpful Gonal-F RFF Pen(Subcutaneous) Photo Gallery: 11 Wow-Worthy Orgasm Facts Wellness inspired. Wellness enabled. Facebook Twitter Instagram Pinterest About Us Careers Editorial Policy Newsletters Privacy Policy Health News Accessibility Statement Terms of Use Contact Us Feedback Our Sponsors Do Not Sell My Personal Information AdChoice NEWSLETTERS Get the best in health and wellness Enter your email Subscribe By subscribing you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. Everyday Health is among the federally registered trademarks of Everyday Health, Inc.Badges Badges Badges Badges Badges. And if you have a clitoris, the more you know about it, the more options you’ll be able to explore en route to achieving satisfaction. (Or, if you’re aiming to please someone who has a clitoris, you can work with your partner to discover the techniques that take them to tingle town.) We’ve reached out to experts and research to put together a guide for flying solo and giving or receiving some seriously satisfying clitoral stimulation. After all, getting busy with your own bod can help you chuck unwanted inhibitions. Plus, find out the truth about clitoral anatomy. It’s more than just a tiny hotspot. Get your own O-game on Share on Pinterest Throw out any taboos or guilt surrounding masturbation right now. You won’t go blind. You won’t get addicted. And, no, it’s not cheating on a partner. It’s more than about feeling great, too. Pleasuring yourself has health benefits that go beyond the body — it can help untangle shame that affects confidence with yourself, partnered sex, or in a relationship. “It’s hard to know what to ask for from your partner if you don’t know what you like,” says Diana Sadat, a sex therapist and clinical counselor in Vancouver, British Columbia. “Masturbation is a chance to explore what feels good. You may notice that stimulating in round patterns feels better than up and down, or that you enjoy stimulation using your inner labia over your clitoris rather than direct clitoral stimulation.” Start out soft and slow and then apply more pressure or speed as your body asks for it. A little teasing yourself can also amp up the pleasure and save on hand cramps. Begin, stop for a few seconds, and then delve back in. Repeat as necessary. Positions and ways to stimulate your clitoris “Aye, there’s the rub.” Use your hand, fingers, or a sex toy to slide up and down or back and forth across your clitoris and clitoral hood. “Tap dance.” A gentle tapping motion on your clit and hood can help you slowly build to orgasm. Speed it up as you wish. “Get in the grind.” No hands required, and no need to take off your clothes. (It can be better if you leave those jeans on!) Straddle a pillow and grind your pelvis to get yourself there. “Peace pinch.” Use your first two fingers like a peace sign to softly pinch your clitoral hood and gently tug up and down, or slide your fingers in a back-and-forth motion. “Orbit the planet.” Use your finger to trace slow circles around your clit and hood, touching your labia in the process. “Fun zones.” Because of the unique shape of the clitoris, you may become aroused and even achieve orgasm by massaging other erogenous zones, on their own or along with the clitoris. Try your labia, vaginal opening, inner thigh, perineum, and anus. Lie on your belly and reach backward for easier access to everything, including the clit. This is also a great position to get your grind on while touching the rest of your sexy self. “Penetration station.” The internal structures of the clitoris encircle the vaginal canal, so penetrating your vagina with your fingers or a sex toy can bring bliss. Combine with any of the above external stimulating techniques for a double delight. “Good vibes.” You can use a vibrating sex toy to enhance or practice any method mentioned above. Vibrators can be especially good for those who need to put minimal movement on their hands or wrists. Use the lowest setting first and rev as desired. Different techniques can elicit different types of pleasure, and how you go about stimulating yourself is completely up to you. Sadat just has one universal tip: Give your bod a chance to warm up. “It takes your clitoris some time to get aroused and for blood to begin to flow,” she explains. “So begin to stroke around your clitoris, touching your labia without directly going for the clit for a bit until you feel ready for that type of stimulation.” How do I stimulate my clit from the inside. Share on Pinterest Before we go any further on this stimulating topic, we’ve got to debunk the inaccurate concept that the clitoris is just a mini, pea-sized version of the penis. As reported by the Atlantic, the clitoris is actually shaped more like a wishbone. But even that comparison doesn’t come close to celebrating its glory. The full anatomy of the clitoris looks like an upside-down flower with large petals extending inside the body that embrace the vaginal canal. It can even become erect when aroused. So in that regard, don’t focus only on what you see and can touch externally. If we touched penises based on that mentioned myth, we’d only be touching the tip and missing out on bigger pleasures. Is the G-spot really another C-spot. Research indicates that it’s likely the place where your clitoris meets the anterior (front) vaginal wall. This is where the clit’s bulbs form a heart shape that hugs the canal. So for people who have vaginas, the orgasm probably really is all about the clitoris, but we can stimulate it indirectly from inside the vagina, directly from outside the vagina, or both. If you’re wondering how to find that spot internally without turn-by-turn directions from Siri, you’re not alone. According to Our Bodies Ourselves, you should try reaching about a third of the way from the vaginal opening and playing with a mix of pressure and stimulation on the front (or upper) wall to see what feels good. It may take some practice and experimentation to locate. Don’t get frustrated if vaginal penetration doesn’t make you come, even if you’ve found that extra sensitive internal trigger spot. In a recent study on the female orgasm, only 18 percent of American women said that vaginal penetration alone could give them the big O. Other respondents in the study said they either needed direct clit stim (about 37 percent) to get them there, or that it greatly ramped up their climaxing pleasure (about 36 percent). Re-cap: Clitoral anatomy 101 Glans clitoris. This is the external nub we think of when picturing the clitoris. Clitoral hood. We all like a good hoodie, and the clitoris is no different. The labia minora connect to form the clitoral hood. When you’re aroused, the hood retracts slightly to expose the glans. If you have a hooded clitoris, don’t worry, its normal. Clitoral body. The clitoral body is internal. It connects to the glans and is suspended from the pubic bone via a ligament. Corpora cavernosa. The clitoral body consists of two corpora cavernosa that become erect during arousal. Paired crura. The clitoral body branches off to form two appendages. These “legs” straddle the urethra and the vaginal canal and become engorged with blood when you’re turned on. Vestibular bulbs. The vestibular bulbs form an upside-down heart shape, with the urethra and the vaginal canal at the heart’s cleavage. The bulbs reach through and behind the labia, around the vaginal canal, and toward the anus. They also swell when you’re hot and bothered. Knowing every part of your clitoris is kind of like putting together a unique outfit. Each of our bodies and the makeup below is different. For some people, playing with the clitoral hood brings pleasure, while for others, the vestibular bulbs bring on all the sensation. You don’t have to address every part, just the ones that work for you. And that may change as you age or explore, and it may be different when you’re with a new partner. Clitoral stimulation for a partner or with a partner If you’re the clitoris owner, don’t be shy about letting on about your stimulation likes or dislikes. There’s also no shame in making all the contact you want with your own clit during a sexual encounter. If you’re dating someone with a clitoris, don’t be afraid to ask about your partner’s desires too. Frame the question around how invested you are in discovering their pleasure points and taking the time to do so — without placing pressure on them to perform. Experimenting (with consent), vocalizing (no, you don’t have to be a screamer unless you want to), and listening to desires are all equally important when it comes to having sex with someone. That go-to spot that felt good last week. It may have moved two inches over to a new spot. You just never know, and that’s why we’re giving out all the options on giving and receiving clitoral stimulation. How to focus on the clitoris during partner play 1. Be handsy Many penetrating positions (whether using a penis, hand, or toy) allow for either a partner’s hand, your own hand, or even both, to play with the clitoris and clitoral hood. 2. Pillow props Grind your clit on an artfully placed pillow or bunched-up blankets while your partner penetrates your vagina with a penis, toy, or fingers from behind. 3.